Life Lecture

Today's the day before my exam, the one and only.
I did some laundry as it was sunny this morning.
Had lunch with my friend, went over to a cafe to have coffee and dessert, had some fruits at home.
Well, it was just some kind of every day activity, might be boring if that's all, I won't bother to write anything anyway.

It happened just now, this evening, when my brother told me that he's coming end of this month.
He was booking a ticket, didn't buy it as he hasn't finished his visa application.
He still need to do medical check-up before his visa can be granted.
So we were discussing about when he should arrive in Melbourne.

He told me he's coming on 26th Nov - "Oh no, that's when the French Festival is!"
"How about 25th?"
"Erm, no, flights are full on 24th, so I can't arrive on 25th, but I can come on 24th...."
"(Another "Oh no!") Erm, can't do....."

And conversation went around talking about him can arrive on either 25th or 26th and me planning on taking him along to Gold Coast on 28th. It was okay until my father joined the conversation. "I had a baaaaddd feeling about this...." And here goes, sometimes even my hunches can be right.

"So you're going to Cairns, and the week after that you're going to Gold Coast???" my dad asked in the middle of our 'soon-to-be argument' conversation, things have been heating up for quite awhile now.
"(S**t, s**t, S**T! I wasn't really planning on telling him about it, at least for now....)"
And he started lecturing me, about my past mistakes and stuffs.

I couldn't think that straight anymore, can only stare on his hordes of sentences he threw at me at once. I couldn't even concentrate on my exercises I was doing anymore. Then I realised some kind of heat on my ears, I can tell that they are bright red, it feels like my father's words were said right next to my ears directly.

Well, can't do anything anymore, I was too excited on going for trips and whoever mentioned going to someplace interesting, I just can't help but fit things to my schedule, my bad habit for sure. This is when you are wrong when you plan ahead, perhaps.

But I need to admit, I went a bit too far this time, not just one but TWO trips? And moreover I still planned some more! I think I overdid it for real, blinded by the illusion of graduation and getting a job. Now I'm being slapped back to reality, my father's telling me that those are illusions if I don't focus on tomorrow's exam.

Well, sometimes in life even planning something one month ahead is too early. Sometimes you just have to focus what's in front of you. When you get your priority right, you'll understand. If I don't pass tomorrow's exam, graduation and job are just a dream.

Even though I'm not that happy with all those lectures, my dad has a point. It was just another reminder for me, a virtual slap, to wake up from these delusions and march forward for the mean time.

Time to hit the books and notes again, get some rest, then revise again tomorrow morning.

I know everything will be fine, I know I'll pass this, I know I can do it.

Have faith in self and effort.

Reflection before the Outbond

Well, somehow I'm just glad being myself.
There are many times in my life that I envied people around me or someone I heard of.
It's just human if think again, we do commit the sin called 'envy', and to counter that we are blessed with gratefulness.

I'm grateful to be myself, even if I'm usually sick, even if I'm weak....
It just made me watch on what I'm eating, maybe that's why I didn't get overweight at all even if I ate a lot back when I was in Indonesia....

Yesterday I went to Grampians National Park, and tomorrow I'm going for an outbond at Peninsula, staying overnight there with other PPIA committees.

The more I travel, the more my vision broaden.
I see more of the world, make myself more mature, give me more experiences.
I realise that not everyone can be like me, and so vice versa with other people, I can't be like them all the time.

I know that even though I've traveled to so many different places, I'm still childish....
But I can feel that every journey I had in my life changed me little by little, and it's what makes this world beautiful, small changes that will be seen as big in the future by others.

I need to get up early tomorrow and reach Caulfield by 7.45 for the outbond.
You guys know what I meant?

It's simple, by seeing the time now (9.45pm) and the place I lived (city/south melbourne)...

Guessed already?

Another clue: It takes 1/2 hour to get to Caulfield from my apartment

Last clue: I'm not feeling that well.

Yes, I need to go to sleep NOW!

Nights everyone.