Home???

Home is supposed to be friendly, warm, safe.... Basically a place to live.

I can call my house in Jogja a home definitely....
It's a place where my family live, they give me warmth and security.
I enjoy living there.

How about the apartment I'm living in Melbourne at the moment?
I don't know, there always problems surfacing whenever things started to calm down, it's just like the sea where you always have tides.
When my housemates are quarreling, things are being awkward here.
When they are friendly to each other, it seems like I don't exist anymore...
Don't you feel offended that way? They watched movie together, knowing that I am around, didn't say anything and suddenly watch movie together....
They plan to go out enjoying day-off, knowing me having day-off as well, but didn't ask me.

Is it wrong for three of us to share an apartment in the first place?
Yes, something surely is wrong, don't ask me what how when why where.....
I tried to be positive but I just can't at the moment....
With so many things going on, work, study, volunteer.... My body can't cope anymore, especially with things going around the house....

Is it wrong for me to wish that a home is the only support when I feel that everything's gone wrong? Can't I wish that we, three of us, spend time together on our free time to support each other and chill out as housemates?

Anyway, I just need a place to share my feelings.
If I mention this to my family, they'll be attacking with me moving to city is wrong and blah blah blah.... which prove that me moving out from Clayton is a mistake.
Well, I did admit that it is a mistake at one point, but I just don't want to admit it to my parents yet....

I know it's a mistake and I know it's up to me to fix it. I'll try to see the situation first about this apartment. And in regards to work and study, I'll prove myself that I can handle it, be it storm be it thunder, none is to stop me.

Time to go back to study!

Second Interview

I got an e-mail yesterday afternoon, stating that I got through the Group Assessment and is up for second interview, YAYYYY!!!!!!!

My interview will be on the store that I applied the position for, which is South Melbourne. It is scheduled on Tuesday 11.30am. If possible, I will change it to later time in the evening any day as I have tutorial that time. However, as I really want this job, I need to give up something as well in case my availability doesn't match the store manager's availability. I am willing to skip my tute!

The interview itself will take about 15 minutes, I will surely do my best in order to get this job!

Proofreading

Hi again,

Last night I saw this email from an editor who was in charge of the Indonesian textbook which I'm working for. She sent me an email regarding a proofreading job which need to be urgently done by Monday. She chose me as the proofreader as I live close by (duh, the office it's just across my apartment, haha....). She favored my friend who is an Indonesian teacher to do it, but she's afraid that she won't make it on time as my friend is living far away. But she would ask my friend in case I declined the offer.

So what did I do? I accepted it of course! I know it's an easy job with good pay! Haha.... I will proofread the workbook, not the textbook. ;)

I thought it won't be much, but in reality it's just as thick as the textbook, the material that I received have at least 100 sheets! At first I thought that I would be in trouble as I still have assignment to do over the weekend, but I convinced myself that this is a challenge that I need to accomplish!

I'm not sure like how much I'll get from this work, but I will try to finish it by tomorrow! Ok, back to work! I still have study to catch up as well!

Stupid Idiot!

Well, actually I want to talk about my group assessment which I went through today, but maybe that needs to be changed.

I'm furious at the moment!
Stupid idiot housemate!
I was mad at him before as you know. I wasn't about to forgive him yet....
Until suddenly he called me one afternoon and cried about his broken laptop.
Then at home he told me about his misfortunes which happened recently.

Maybe I'm too soft, that's why I thought, "OK, OK, up to you!" and tried not to ignore him anymore, but that does not mean I forgive him or acted normal like the way before.

And today he just made me MAD, ANGRY, RAGED, and FURIOUS for the same mistake he did before!!!!!! Such a BASTARD! It's either I didn't state it clearly or that he's DUMB!
Only an idiot who don't know when to stop and I'm sure he is one right now.

Oh I don't care, if he comes again and cried I'll just ignore him, I won't give a damn anymore, I'm already too busy with everything to deal with him at the moment. Who cares? He's not going to be here for summer anyway, after exam he'll go, so I'll just bear for a month right? Then when he's back the lease contract will end, so? CIAO! If I get this job I will be able to afford a one-bedroom apartment in which I'll be sharing with my brother in June!

That's it for today, I'm tired and I need to go to sleep as I need to wake up early tomorrow. Will talk about the group assessment in the morning maybe, bye.

Job Offers

At first I thought that today was such a bad day.

I overslept, I slacked, and I was late for a resume check which is very important as I am applying for an Industry Based Learning in Monash.
The application itself is due this Friday and I am left with the 500-word statement to be checked before I send my application.

Moreover, it was such a hot day in the morning, I was sweating a lot and I even thought that summer came too early to Melbourne.

In campus, I strayed myself around.
I printed study materials, I had lunch, I drank coffee, I browsed internet, etc etc.....

Then my group mate called to meet for assignment. The group meeting was supposed to be at 12pm and it was 2pm when she called me.... =___=
When I was to go to the meeting place which is located in different building, there was a storm, it rained heavily and I was like, "S**t!"

And here I went with my determination for assignment, rushing through rain. I was wet from head to toe. And guess what time my friends came? 2.35pm, great.....

While we were having a meeting,I got a call from Red Energy, an energy company located in Richmond. She offered me a telesales assistant position as I was not selected in the other 2 jobs that I applied. It will be an interesting job as I will be dealing with phone calls. It's an Australian company so I'm sure I'll be able to develop myself in Australian culture. What's better, the environment won't be that bad as she said that there are a lot of students doing part-time in that company.
The pay itself is quite good I think, the job required me to spare 20-hour per week and I'll get $40,000 p.a pro rata.

What's the definition of pro-rata? I searched through Google and the easiest definition was found through Yahoo! Answer:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070806141022AAR4GhC

So that means that I'll be getting about $20,000p.a if I work part-time.
If I got accepted here (I will hear the decision this Friday), I cannot take other part-time jobs as I will breach my visa if I do so.

But I can do it, as it's going to be summer holiday, so I can work MORE!

Then there is this call from New Zealand Ice Cream, she offered me a job as well and wished to have an interview asap. I arranged it for this Friday morning. I'm sure this week is going to be a very hectic week for me indeed.....

She required me to do at least 4 6-hour shifts per week, so a minimum of 24 hours per week during summer!

And I'm going to do a Group Assessment with Woolworths as well tomorrow, well, group assessment is just like a group interview where they also test your abilities....

So, which one should I choose?

Never Ending Cycle

Well, we live in this world with several cycles going on and on forever.

It's good if we can have long happy life and short sadness within, yet reality is cruel.
Ever since I entered Uni, my life cycle has been a terrible one, especially this year.

Short happiness, long pain which leave unforgettable scar.

Well, at certain point, I feel that it's a valuable experience which I won't get if I didn't come to Australia for sure. But some of this pain.... I just want to forget it, I want to leave it, I want to destroy this cycle.

What do you feel when you are a soft person living with 2 obstinate housemates?
It's terrible really, sometimes I'm regretting my decision moving out (with them), but there are some experiences that I won't get if I didn't do that.
It is a cycle just like war, kept on repeating itself even when it's solved before, leaving another scar which one could not forget.
I'm just tired at the moment, seeing this condition, I moved here since I wished for a peaceful life, everyone in the house are close, I just wished for a warm place that I can call "home" just like my real home in Indonesia.

And now I know that it's just a wishful thinking, you won't find it.
All I need to do is just bear for it until next year, then I'll move with my brother who's coming to Melbourne! (not confirmed though)

What if he cancel the arrangement and decided to study somewhere else? Duh, I'll just move to a one-bedroom apartment or a share apartment instead, at least I don't need to care for the other party. I learn from my current housemates how to be hard-headed, should I say thanks?

Well, at least I've changed, regardless of this childish act, I'm still learning and I hope I'll be mature soon, so I can look for my brother here and give him guidance.
Somehow this is the only reason why I have not transferred to Malaysia, been wishing to go there for so long...

Anyway, what's wrong with me? It seems like I've been complaining when I'm blogging, ahahaa..... Sorry, but this is the only place that I can complain since I don't feel like complaining in either facebook nor twitter, too many people can see it.

Phew, I've been blogging all this time putting so few pictures, eh?
My friends who blogged always put some pictures, but in fact I'm so lazy to do that, ahaha.... I'll try my best to put pictures next time.

Ok, back to study, ciao!

End of Mid-break

Today.....

Daylight Saving starts,
is a warm and sunnny day,
I've got work at 6-9.30pm,
is the END OF MY MID-BREAK!

I've been having these negative thoughts because of it.
Maybe because I'll be having my exam in 3 weeks, I'm starting to freak out.
I still need time to study, my study mood hasn't come back to be, and I've got a little bit of trauma.

From this stressful feeling, I am thinking that I need some refreshment while studying bit by bit. So yesterday I went to my friend's house to cook together and enjoy lunch.
It's also to celebrate one of my friend's b'day who had her b'day earlier this week.

It was good. But there is one thing which ruin everything, work.
I am currently working at a Malaysian restaurant as a waiter.
The pay was not that good, but the colleagues and the work itself are satisfactory.
The problem is, yesterday was such a hectic day, I can still comprehend that. However, I met so many 'hard-to-deal-with' customers and it annoys me, for 5 freaking hours!
There are so many friends that I know who went to eat there, good to talk with them, but there is this one guy, acting all high and mighty (in my eyes) even if he's not better than me, the way he acted was like he was looking down at me. "Just PISS OFF!" is what I thought, his condition is nothing to be proud of yet he dare to do that? Ok, they tease me a bit, it's not a bad thing EXCEPT that they can't see others mood, and I was such a moody person that I am annoyed to the max.
At least I've got such a calm and cool (as well as ignorant at some certain point) personality that I've get to deal with all those 5-hour of work without any food or drink! I was at disbelieve as well, my colleagues at the bar didn't make any drinks for me even if I've asked the 3 times, once every hour, and their excuse was that they were very busy even if they were able to make drinks for everyone else except me, duh....

What ruined my day was this housemate of mine who's stressing out about his assignment.
No need to go for further details about his assignment, but I tried my best to support him all this time, trying to break the ice as much as I can.
And guess what, he recorded me. I forced him to delete it and he refused.
You need to know, he was so pissed of before when I recorded him, and I complied by deleting the file. See? Such a childish act of him.
Moreover, he kept on playing the video, laughing as much as he can.
I started to stop comprehending, I'm just too tired and too mad that time (not that I have stopped my anger though.
He kept on saying, I'm the type of people who remember." Yeah right, as if you remember on the case that I just mention before, he must have forgotten that, duh.
I DO REMEMBER AS WELL, and once it's gotten in my mind, it's there just like a root!

There are times when people need to apologise directly, especially in this case. Why? Because he's holding the video which I demand to delete. If he apologise today, I can get suspicious that he already back it up somewhere.

Oh well, he's the type who don't apologise anyway, can't expect much from any of my housemates. At least I get to know more even if I'm sick of it. I'm sick of this house already, glad to know it now, before extending contract or moving together to other place. Maybe I'm the type who need to stay in a one-bedroom apartment afterall.....

Oh such a negative minds I'm having, just wondering why all bad things have to be dumped on me at the same time, I'm hating it.

Ok, sunny day outside, need to be more positive, nothing you can do over something bad which happened already.

What to do? Think positive and think of what I can do for things like this not to happen again. I think I need to start browsing for those one-bedroom property for rent. Hey, wait, Let's just focus on exam first, that can come after that. :p